Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror, complaining to my husband that my breasts are too small. Instead of characteristically telling me it's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion.
"If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."
Willing to try anything, I get a piece of toilet paper and stand in front of the mirror, rubbing it between my breasts. "How long will this take?" I ask? "They will grow larger over a period of years," he replies.
I stop. "Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?" Without missing a beat he says? Worked for your butt, didn't it?"
He's still alive, and with a great deal of therapy, may even walk again. Stupid, stupid man